Dr. Caitlin Burges, a physician and mother of three, is stepping back from what she calls "competitive motherhood." Her shift comes from a growing recognition that overscheduled childhoods harm both kids and parents.
Burges argues that children benefit more from unstructured time than packed activity calendars. Research from Boston College's Polisky Center for Entrepreneurship found that kids with excessive extracurriculars report higher stress levels and show no academic advantage over moderately involved peers. Burges's own experience as both a doctor and exhausted parent taught her that the relentless pursuit of impressive résumés starts too early.
The pressure to craft perfectly curated childhoods extends beyond activities. Parents now face pressure to document milestones, enroll children in elite programs, and create social media-worthy moments. This culture leaves families financially strained and emotionally drained. A 2023 American Psychological Association survey showed parents cite "keeping up with other families" as a major source of parenting stress.
What does stepping back look like practically? Burges prioritizes what her family actually enjoys. Her children attend school and participate in one or two activities each, chosen for genuine interest rather than resume-building. She protects free time for imaginative play, family meals, and simply being bored. Boredom, research shows, actually sparks creativity in children.
Her quote captures the shift: "My kids don't need a childhood that looks impressive on paper. They need one that feels good while they're living it." This reflects a larger parenting movement toward what some call "slow parenting" or "simplicity parenting," championed by experts like Denise Pope at Stanford University, whose research demonstrates that downtime and family connection matter more to children's wellbeing than achievement.
For parents feeling trapped in the competition cycle, Burges's